What it means to forgive. The hard facts.
We often think of forgiveness as a one time thing. Someone wrongs us, they apologize, we forgive. While sometimes this is true, more often than not the scenario is much different. Real forgiveness is a daily choice. A choice to be like Christ and forgive the unrepentant, the unforgivable, the person who's not sorry.
I've come to learn some pretty eye opening facts over the past few months. Real life happens like this: we forgive, moved on, leave the last in the past. But...people are still people, they say one thing and do another. Apologies aren't followed through with change like we hoped for, and just like that we're back where we started. This is when real forgiveness is hard.
The decision is up to us, become bitter or better. This is so hard! It's a choice we sometimes have to make daily. However, I can say first hand it hurts you more than anyone. On days when I dwell on the facts and not the grace I should be filled with, I'm useless. I'm miserable and defeated, in turn I project those feelings on those around me. It only makes matters worse, as strange as that may be.
So to those of you out there who aren't feeling the whole forgiveness thing, I hear ya. It doesn't feel fair or right to forgive someone who doesn't even care that they hurt you. But it's the right thing to do, the thing that will help you heal. As I write this, I'm saying a little prayer for anyone who is struggling with this today! You're not alone.